I feel like 47 of you have broken up with me. Okay, not really. But I want to make you feel shame. SHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAME.
If you continue with this behavior, you leave me no choice...I'll have to start posting pictures of Ligers.
There are more where that came from.
But seriously, what do you want from me? We need to DTR, people. Do you want more money? More stability? Maturity?! You knew who I was when we first got together. I can't blog and pretend to be someone else. You have driven me to distraction. And donuts. And pizza rolls. And ultimately 5 extra pounds...maybe 10. BUT NONE OF US ARE PERFECT! I'm sorry I don't have the body that I use to have. I can't help what I have become.
So, maybe I've let myself go a little. Maybe it is a little disturbing that I can keep my entire manuscript in between my boobs, as well as that little cup. BUT YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME!
We all change.
I'm just asking you for another chance. Please. Pretty please? No? Okay, I'll wait.